20130730_b: five mini-reviews

A. Beautiful Girls

1. Released in 1996, 7.1/10.0 for 21,130 users on IMDB, 78% on Rotten Tomatoes.
2. American theatrical film, rated R, 110 minutes, live action, competent color cinematography.
3. Stars Timothy Hutton, Annabeth Gish, Matt Dillon, Uma Thurman, Noah Emmerich, Lauren Holly, Martha Plimpton, Natalie Portman, Mira Sorvino.
4. Yet another ten year reunion picture, with highlights on broken dreams, stunted careers, and failure to launch.  The men are snafu, and women seem not to be getting what they might get in a richer environment.
5. The sweet chemistry of the scenes between actors Timothy Hutton and Natalie Portman eclipse almost everything else in the film, which is wall-to-wall malaise.  Their age difference (28 for him, 13 for her) is just too great.  However, it did remind me of Parrish (1961), where she (Paige Raike) was 15, he (Parrish McLean) was 18.  He joined the Navy, she finished high school.  Then they got together.  In contrast, I could not figure out any way for the Natalie-Timothy thing to work out.
6. I liked the actors on the whole.  The script seemed a bit diffuse, and the direction weak.
7. Three stars of five.

B. Occult Academy.

1. Japanese anime, released in 2010, 7.0/10.0 on IMDB from 53 users, 24 minute episodes.
2. The first two episodes were enjoyable; I rated them four of five stars.
3. Episode three was two stars of five, next to useless, and I am now stalled on finishing the series.

C. Hakkenden: Eight Dogs of the East

1. Japanese anime, serial episodes, premiered January 5, 2013; first season ended March 30, 2013.  Subtitles; no dubbing.  No IMDB entry.  Wikipedia: hakkenden
2. Episode 1: Borders
3. Dysfunctional families.  Dark, magical forests.  Talking birds and toads.  Children who cannot age physically. 
4. Three stars of five.  I'll try the second episode.

D. Kimikiss: Pure Rouge

1. Japanese anime, serial episodes, premiered October 2007, ended March 2008.  Subtitles; no dubbing.  Wikipedia: Kimikiss
2. Pleasant.  Art is OK.  Mostly about high school relationships, not sci-fi, horror, or magic.  That's refreshing.
3. Might watch the second episode.
4. Four stars of five.

E. Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children

1. Japanese anime, feature length.   101 minutes, released 2005.  IMDB gave it 7.2/10.0 from 39,249 users.  Rotten Tomatoes gave it 33%.
2. It's ugly.  Very.  Enormous, incredibly stupidly designed motorcycles are involved.  This is always a bad sign.  The 3-d modelling was, well, 2005.  That is, about as realistic as a plastic doll.
3. Another huge bad sign was the extra long introduction where the narrator was a child.
4. The background music was ridiculously bad.
5. The base level of graphical detail varies (all too frequently) from photographic realism to third rate animation art that one might see in the seventies.  The ongoing jarring visual discontinuities were dismaying at best.
6. The primary battle with a giant monster was right out of Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers.  The monster's existence made no sense, its ability to function was laughable, and its defeat was even less believable than the other parts.  How could anyone ask for less?
7. In another similarity with MMPR, motorcycles just be stupid...the way they are portrayed here.  Compare that with expertise with real motorcycles, say Steve McQueen in The Great Escape.
8. The sword battles were beneath pitiful.
9. Some of the final music was so inappropriate that I'd have to say this is the worst anime I've ever seen.
10. One star of five.  It deserved much less.