20150523: Horror Review--Strippers Vs. Werewolves

Strippers Vs. Werewolves

1. Fundamentals.
1. Title: Strippers Vs. Werewolves
2. IMDb: Users rated this 3.1/10 (1,456 votes)
3. Rotten Tomatoes:
   29% based on 7 critics' ratings
   14% of users liked it, from 216 viewer ratings
   Critics Consensus: No consensus yet.


4. Status: Released
5. Release date: 2012-04-27
6. Production Companies: Black & Blue Films
7. Tagline: No tagline found.


8. Budget:  Budget estimate not available at review time.
9. Revenue: Revenue figures not available at review time.
10. Runtime: 93 minutes.
11. Genres: Comedy, Horror, Foreign


12. Directed by: Jonathan Glendening.  Written by: Pat Higgins


13. Starring: Adele Silver as Justice, Barbara Nedeljakova as Raven, Billy Murray as Ferris, Martin Compston as Scott, Sarah Douglas as Jeanette, Steven Berkoff as Flett, Alan Ford as Harry, Martin Kemp as Mickey, Lucy Pinder as Vampire Bride, Robert Englund as Tapper, Lysette Anthony as Basildon Cinemagoer.


14. TMDb overview: Mickey, who happens to be a werewolf and a crime boss, gets all worked up and hairy during a private dance at a strip club. Justice, the dancer, grabs the nearest weapon and lands a fatal blow: her silver fountain pen right through Mickey's wolfed-out eye. This ignites a small-scale war between Mickey's group of werewolf mobsters and the sultry strippers of Vixens.


2. Setup and Plot


1. At first I thought I was trapped in a badly edited version of Guy Ritchie's brilliant piece, Snatch (2000).  Then I realised that the seasoned, talented cast was missing as was the fine screenplay and tight direction.  (Well, Alan Ford was in both films, as Brick Top in Snatch, as Harry in this film.) The artwork for the credits looked a little too familiar, and the props, language, and atmosphere seemed recycled.


2. Instead of the wealth of fun and wry humour of Snatch, one has a jumbled mess about a deadly feud between those who work at a strip club and a gang of criminal werewolves.  The fake blood was unconvincing, the fights were ridiculously bad, and the gratuitous full frontal female nudity (first third of the film) was 12 on a scale of 1 to 10.  The werewolf makeup was not well executed, and I could have done without the werewolves masturbating.  


3. On the positive side, Robert England's performance was good, but also quite short.  Lysette Anthony was OK in a cameo, and there were a few laughs.


3. Conclusions
1. Did I identify with any of the characters? No. Did I empathise with any? No. Were the few laughs worth the overall low quality of the film? No. Was the climactic battle interesting? Well, no.


2. One line summary: No werewolves were harmed during the making of this motion picture.


3. One of ten


4. Scores
1. Cinematography: 2/10 The sets were particularly badly done.  The use of split screen was more annoying than helpful.  The injected cartoon slides really marked this film as badly done.


2. Sound: 5/10 I could hear the dialog, such as it was.  The music was irritating.


3. Acting: 3/10 Sarah Douglas, Robert Englund, and Lysette Anthony were fine, but they did not portray the main characters.


4. Screenplay: 0/10 The main failure.